Epilogue

Epilogue

R and I changed a lot over the period of time when his mom had cancer. We changed a lot after it, too. Because nobody stays the same forever, we're all destined to change. One thing that didn't change about us two, though, is that we always stayed friends. Of course, he made new friends, and so did I. We might even have spent more time with our other friends, but R and I had formed a bond that comes from trusting each other completely. We've stayed friends our whole life, even after we went down our other paths. R went on to become a doctor, and I (somewhat surprisingly, I guess) became a psychologist. Our other friends also went down different roads, and eventually I lost touch with most of them, except for an email now and then. But R and I didn't drift apart. Even when we lived far away, we took the time to visit each other. It was a friendship that wasn't about to be broken.

I stayed by his side when his mom died after having cancer for about a year. I didn't always have the right words to say, but he didn't always need words. Sometimes people just need someone there for them, someone who understands what they're going through, and that's who I tried to be.

I also stayed with him when he was having a tough time in school. When he was married, I was his best man. When his first baby was born, I was there to make a complete fool out of myself with him.

And I wasn't the only faithful friend. R was there for me, making himself very uncomfortable when my grandfather died. But I appreciated his help. I needed it.

So even though we had changed so much, we still stuck together. I was still shy. I never really completely got over my shyness, and I know I never will. It really just is in my nature. But I improved, and my agreement with R about talking to someone new every day helped me a lot. It also helped to keep R from hurting himself, which he was faithful to. A few times he faltered, and even though it hurt me deeply, I stood by him. I helped him even when I thought I couldn't.

Now, I'm not trying to make anybody out there feel bad because you haven't done that for a friend. I would never have dreamed I could have done such things as I did, but I did them because I cared about somebody enough. So maybe my life can be a lesson to you, that if there's someone out there you love enough to want to help, then go that extra mile. Prove something to yourself, and to the people around you. And if you think you can't do it, if you think you're going to give up, just remember me. I'm the guy who never went on any of the rides at the fair because I was worried about what I would look like. I'm the guy who spoke as little as possible in class, even when I knew the right answer and nobody else did.

Was I the type of guy who could stand up and help somebody out even when I was shaking in my boots?

No.

That's what I would have told myself back then.

But I didn't give myself the chance to ask. I just jumped in, and I did it.

So don't ask. Don't give yourself more doubts.

Just jump in.

My life was never anything to be considered 'normal', but I learned to like it that way. And my life definitely wasn't always full of excitement, like the things that I've just told you about. This account was just a few weeks in the grand scheme of things. Like my Mom would say, just a page in the book of life. Or like my Aunt Jessie would say, only a dot on the art canvas of life.

But I think my best friend R summed it up the best when he said to me one day,

“I feel like that time was put in our life for a reason. Because we needed it. It helped us become the people that we are now. It could have shaped us for the worse, but we didn't let it. We just took that experience and moved on. And I'm really glad we did.”